Saturday, May 10, 2014

I'm SO Sorry!

Dear blog,

I hope the title of the blog says it all. I truly and most sincerely sorry that I have neglected you so! I've been so focused on my novels and jump starting my freelance clientele that I have left your pages unwritten. Like a sorely neglected friend, I have left you behind in our special place on the interwebs. If you will have me back, I would so love to resume our friendship.

The Saddest Blogger in the World,

~Me


Dear Meatbag,

Get bent.

Signed, 

~An Angry, Neglected Blog


Dear blog,

:( :( :( I'm so SOOOOOORY! Please find in your heart (do blogs have hearts?) to move past my horribleness. I am a horrible person for under utilizing you and not helping you live up to your fullest potential. Can we ever be friends again?

The Most Horrible Blogger on the Interwebs,

~ Me


Dear Flesh Puppet,

I sincerely doubt that our friendship will ever be the same again. You should just move on and create some other blog to abuse. I'm tried of your shit. Also, YES WE HAVE HEARTS! And they happen to be a reflection of the owner's. So if you find me crappy, you only have yourself to blame.

Signed,

~Screw you, I'm going home.

P.S. There aren't enough sad faces in the world to earn you enough pity. Please stop at three. KTHXBAI.


Dear Blog,

Are you breaking up with me??? Ok. Fine. Yea. I deserve it. I guess I will just make another blog on wordpress. Something that looks professional and an actual website. Not google's horrible attempt to be "cool" and "relevant" on the web. Yea, I said it. G+ suxs!

Screw you too!

~Me

Dear Two Timing Blogger,

I cannot believe you would give up so easily on our relationship. Have I meant nothing to you? Do I still mean nothing to you? Why? Why would you say something this horrible to me?

Signed,

~A Crushed and Lonely Blog


Dear Blog,

*Sighs* I'm sorry. I seem to be saying that a lot lately. I said those things out of anger. I truly do like your platform and ease of use. It's why I chose you instead of that other site. Please, let's just forget about all of this and let's be friends again. I truly am sorry.

~Me

Dear Human Face,

<(^_^<) <(^_^)> (>^_^)>

Signed,

~A Forgiving Blog

Dear Blog,

Yay! I promise to stay more active on your site and post twice a month. I won't neglect you again!

Love,

~Me

2 comments:

  1. LOL! Everyone neglects their blogs occasionally, I think. (I know I have sometimes!) Glad to see your blog eventually forgave you! :)

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    Replies
    1. :-) Thanks Heather. I wasn't sure my blog was going to forgive me. At first it started out as a fun way of saying "yes I'm back" but then all of a sudden my blog developed a persona like one of my characters. It was a bit disconcerting. :-/

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